OP: "I have an issue.
My mom has been against me going raw, and she now is wanting me to eat cooked processed foods.
She wants me to eat more things with rice and grains and i dont really want to eat them.
Do you guys have any suggestions on what i should do or any recipes?
Thanks so much :)"
The dissent or "being against something" is the mother, not the daughter. Maybe we could have the mom post on here, because she seems to be the one with the problem. We can help the mom be more positive, "Hey, that's great, honey, that you eat 40 servings of fruits and vegetables per day."
Man, I wish the OP were my teenage girl! I'd be proud.
superfood-I definitely understand your point of view and your advice. My parents had my best interests in mind during my childhood but often overlooked alot of things regarding my personal nutritional needs. I don't hold any of that against them since I know their motives were pure. I'm coming from an opposite background as you and so my advice differs. I want her to be able to get along with her mother since she'll probably be living there for a while yet. I don't want her to have to eat cooked food if she doesn't want to but I do think that she could compromise by taking what her mother is concerned about and finding a way to still eat raw food while ebbing those concerns.
Thanks for your input..
I didn't see your other posts sorry.
The mother is certainly being less than understanding but we can't control her and the daughter can't control her so being able to live with the person and be happy takes a bit of work. The mother is causing the dissent and the danger is that their relationship(if good, I don't know) could be ruined over this.
I never suggested the daughter disrespect the mother or do anything negative.
You mention a lack of control - the daughter can control what she puts in her body, and she probably needs that control. Can you imagine how you would feel if you were forced to eat something you didn't want in your body? It's a horrible feeling. I understand the daughter may need more calories, but she can get that through raw. There's no need to cause emotional damage to the daughter because the mother has a problem handling having a raw-foodist daughter and/or has no knowledge of nutrition (which is typical). It doesn't make the mother bad; I'm not saying that. I'm saying the daughter has a choice.
Okay, I totally agree with everything you said right there.......btw I was trying to say that she should get her calories by eating high calorie raw food NOT cooked food. I definitely agree that most parents don't know nearly enough about nutrition and that can be frustrating for a daughter whose mother sounds like she buys the food and chooses what to buy.
The daughter DOES have a choice, the only problem is, if she's not using her own income to buy her own food then she might not have as much of a choice as she'd like which would make a difficult situation where she'd have to convince or educate her mother on why she needs to stay on raw food. Getting her mother on the same page will help their relationship as well as allow her to continue to eat raw food. That's all I was saying:)
superfood, i basically agree with everything you have said.
my mom was worried/upset when i started eating RAW because i had an eating disorder and was already pretty thin. she tried to get me to eat cooked foods and such, but i got to the point where i just stopped eating them. if she wasn't going to buy me the food i wanted, then she would have to watch starve. she came around a lot and buys a lot of my groceries now. i don't want to say that i "taught her a lesson," but i did show her that i was the one in control of my eating.
hi everyone :)
i am 16 years old im 5 feet 6.5 inches and my weight is 115 pounds but it goes up and down everyday its always done that.
the thing is is that my mom is actually doing a "raw" thing herself. she is basically juicing and eating fruits and veggies while trying to male me eat boca burgers. its not fair at all.
crap ill have to post this later shes home now. sorry. bye.
why is your mother "doing a raw thing?" if it were for health, then it seems odd she would disapprove of your raw lifestyle. this sounds exactly like my mother, and you sound exactly like me. 5'6.5 ft and 115 lbs is underweight, a BMI of 18.3. Hopefully you are pursuing a raw lifestyle for health and not for weight loss. If you are doing it for the latter, I side with your mother completely. I suffered from an eating disorder during my teenage years and I tried MANY ways of eating (vegan,raw,etc.) and shielded it as a desire to be healthy. To Joannabanana- I understand your mother completely as well. Recovering from an eating disorder means reorienting your relationship with food and how food influences your life and identity, and the fact that you tout that you taught her a lesson because you control your body, was exactly my mindset while suffering. Yes, you should control your body, but to take it to the extreme where you won't eat?! That is hurting your body, regardless of your good intentions. Irony.
I might be a bit biased because I am not 100% raw (especially in college!! where it is impossible eating at a cafeteria), but I think that mikfizzle's obsessiveness with not eating a single cooked grain is insane. This screams some sort of bad relationship with food if you can't give a little ... and be a little flexible, especially if you are underweight.
If, on the other hand mikfizzle, you are doing it for the former reason, then I would recommend you look into eating enough calories, and I would still recommend being a bit more flexible (it will not kill you!).
Sort of off topic, sorry.
Daniefon: You mentioned dried cranberries for your soaked rice. I am having problems finding any dried cranberries that don't have sugar, and/or oil added. Are you finding plain ones? If so, where? Thanks!
I applaud emtpdmom on what she's said in this forum. While I definitely agree that raw food is the best choice for health--a mom is a mom--and sometimes moms have a reason to be worried for their daughter! I'm still young and moved out to be on my own a couple years ago and I know, despite disagreements, that my mother had very legitimate worries for me.
I know you don't want your age to be a factor in your post, but please be honest with yourself. It may be very simple to say you're "healthy" while still not eating enough. Your mother may see something that you aren't willing to see in you. If that is the case, be open to what she sees, and address it with healthy, raw foods. I used to scoff when people would say wisdom comes with age, but it really does. And I'm sure your mother has plenty of it, with nothing but pure concern for you.
If she's right in being concerned for your health, be open and discuss it with her. Educate her about the raw food lifestyle and tell her seriously how much cooked food HURTS you. Tell her the benefits of raw food. Or suggest you'll eat more raw food, with more variety. You're certainly in the right direction by wanting to stay raw, and sometimes there can be difficulties when un-educated people just don't understand what you're doing. So maybe you guys can help each other and grow that way.
Others are right in saying that you own your body--but respect your mother and her concern for you, and address it with her. She's really just looking out for you and loves you. Mothers can't help but do that.
115 at over 5'6" is definitely underweight, you might try to eat more raw calories and fat!
Hiya - I just wanted to say that because body types can be so different, being underweight might mean different things for different people. I personally don't think that 115 pounds at 5' 6" is underweight. I'm about 5' 8" and I'm weighing in at 117 pounds these days (I lost about 4 pounds over the winter making gourmet raw food and desserts for my blog on the weekends and eating green smoothies and big salads during the week. That's what works for me personally. I finally found a good eating rhythm that suits my body and northern climate zone). My husband thinks I'm too skinny at 117 pounds but I actually feel super at this weight. The true test is how I feel when I run my 5.5 mile loop. The lighter I am, the better I feel. I also want to add that I have a very small body frame (small bones?) which probably doesn't help my cause when telling my husand that my weight is just fine.
Now I also know folks who weigh a lot more than myself and are the same height. For them that might be optimal, normal, and ideal. There are just so many variables and one size doesn't fit all. Just wanted to put that out there. :-)
You're absolutely right Joyce. I am far heavier than you but if I was your weight at my height(5'5") I'd be deathly skinny. I have a shorter, broad shouldered body. So I'd be unhealthy at 117. 125 is what my goal is. I'm not there now but I'm close and in the summer I always get down to it because I'm so much more active!
Pixx I don't know where Daniefon gets dried cranberries, but I can't find them unsweetened either. I did find some at whole foods that were sweetened with apple juice but I buy them in the fall and dry them for my use through the year.
Yes, body build is definitely important. Our neighbor's daughter is my height but weighs 130+ pounds (according to her mom) and I think she looks fantastic. She also has a different build than me. She has a more sturdy frame, and is bigger boned than myself. My upper body sometimes looks scrawny depending on my clothes due to my build. So even though we are the same height and she weighs 13+ pounds more than myself, I'm sure she is at an optimal weight as well.
I went through this too, with friends and family. You can always makes breads, nut burgers, crackers, cookies, dried fruit, etc with a dehydrator. That might make your mom feel better. Mine is from Excalibur. Their website is:
Also, try introducing raw foods to her. Once I introduced raw hummus, flax crackers, raw dessert, and entres to my husband, he loved it! It took him a while to get there and he still loves meat and eggs, but when he's craving something light, he'll ask me to make him something. Your mom will get used to it and eventually will stop worrying so much about you! Keep up the good work. It sounds like you are doing great!
I buy them at Whole Foods. They are sweetened with apple juice. It never occured to me that it could be concentrated apple juice. I soak them anyway, so maybe it rinses it off! Oil is not listed as an ingredient.
Thanks nancyk70 & daniefon.
nancyk70- do you just cut them in half, and dry? And how long does it take to dry? Thanks!
I just pierce them with a fork and put them in the dehydrator at 105 for about 24 hours it depends on how large they are the bigger ones take more like 2 days.
I get my dried cranberries at rawvegansource.com they are sweetened with apple juice and raw I dont beleive its concentrate and they are all organic.
I am glad to see mom support I know I may not agree with my mom on all things but as I have gotten older and had my own children I definately have more compassion and empathy for moms who are sincerely well intentioned. The mom daughter relationship can be a tough one.
My mom has read all of the natalia rose books and she eats alot of raw foods like fruits and veggies - she is a level five on natalias plan but transitioning.
I really would like to gain some weight back, i want to put on some muscle but im finding it hard too even though i have upped my caloric intake. I am going to start lifting weight and walking/jogging and doing yoga when school lets out. the weight just keeps coming off. :( I feel my best and healthy eating all 100% raw and i really have no desire to go back to eating cooked foods.
I would say that i have a medium build, and i went from being overweight about a year ago to where i am at now, i have been doing all kinds of reaserch on being a raw vegan and my mom is taking me to a nurtitionist this week. will the nutritionist be open and understanding to me wanting to be a raw vegan?
Can anyone please reccomend some good imformative websites about the health concerns concerning cooked foods, or anyother helpful websites at all.
Try these I found a lot of information when I first went raw some are articles some are raw sites.
this last one has both side views
I don't think it's obsessive to not want a cooked grain. I don't, either. I'm 100% raw probably 360 days out of the year, and the other days are 99.9%. I don't like how cooked foods make me feel, so I don't eat them. This indicates a HEALTHY relationship with food, mind, and body, not an obsessive one. People who continually eat a percentage of cooked food may not understand this, and that's fine, but please don't demean a raw person for being in tune with their body.
superfood can you give me some examples of what you eat on a daily basis, or perhaps tell me how you get protien/vitamans? do you take supplements? if you have read my other recent post you'll see why. :) thanks
Yeah, I eat about 3,500 calories. I take a sublingual B12 and get vitamin D from the sun. Otherwise, I get about 40-80 grams of protein a day (I need about 40).
I eat anywhere from 10-15 bananas, usually 1-4 cups of blueberries, some mangoes, maybe some apples or pears, raspberries, strawberries, maybe some melons. I eat 5-25 cups of greens, including spinach, kale, collards, chard. I eat 1-6 cups of sprouts (non-wheat/non-grain) per day. I drink a fresh green juice per day (celery, cucumber, herbs, greens, etc). I usually have some type of citrus as well. I make zucchini and also cucumber noodles and eat with a sun-dried tomato and fresh tomato sauce. I eat dates if I have them and want them.
Every day is different; I don't mean to be vague. My diet is very clean, and I use very little, if any, spices, garlic, and pink salt. Once I did high-fruit, low-fat, I could tell that celery and tomatoes were awesome sources of sodium. I do shake a little three-seaweed blend into my green juice for iodine.
If I want to eat some fat, I'll have it in the form of avocado, young coconut, hemp seeds, chia seeds, or a small amount of nuts. I'll eat a Brazil nut here and there for extra Selenium.
Greens are a great source of protein, as are sprouts; and sprouts and pumpkin seeds and greens have a good amount of zinc.
i wish i could eat that much, see right now i dont even know if i could fit a fourth of what you eat in a day in my stomach.
what kind of sprouts do you eat? so you sprout yourself at home?
so them im assuming you do not include any beans in your diet, my mom wanted to know if like eating raw dried beans was okay. i told her that i had no idea.
and your not being vauge at all that was way more descriptive than i was expecting.
do you have any suggestions on what i could do to maybe up my intake of foods?
I buy my sprouts because I'm not a good sprouter, don't have air conditioning, and I'm severly allergic to mold, so I can't take my chances on messing up my own. :)
I like clover, alfalfa, radish, cabbage, broccoli, onion (I don't eat onions, though), snow pea, sunflower, and garbanzo. The only way I would eat legumes is sprouted, so I would do sprouted lentils and beans.
I guess you could try juicing or smoothies more than solid foods and make sure you sip all day a fruit & greens smoothie?
Be careful on the beans, if you choose to sprout them. Some types really should not be eaten raw. I have read black beans and kidney beans, not sure if there are others.
Here is a great site with loads of information on sprouting: http://sproutpeople.com/
The only ones I have ever had mold are sunflower.
If you really dont want to eat cooked food maybe she will buy u some good quality supplements/ superfoods - maybe that will satisfy her?
Mikfizzle- I went through the same exact thing with my mother. I don't live with her, but every time I saw her, she'd tell me how terrible I looked, how skinny I was, etc. And then she'd say, "You need FOOD." And try to feed me macaroni and cheese. After a few months, though, once she finally realized that I really, really didn't want macaroni and cheese (although it's delicious, but detrimental), she started offering me fruit and smoothies every time I went over. Now she introduces me as a raw foodist to her friends... So maybe it just takes a while for moms to come around. Stick with it!